Bobby’s parents were curious about what career he’d pursue – law, banking, medicine or the clergy. A friend told them to put Bobby in a room with a cigar, a dollar bill, a lollipop and a Bible. The item then he picks would indicate his calling. Then go pray for him while he is in the room.
When Bobby came out of the room he was sucking on the lollipop, sniffing the cigar, tucking the dollar bill into his pocket and holding the Bible under one arm. “Oh, no!” the family friend gasped. “He’s going to be a politician!”
Bobby was invited to his friend’s house for dinner. When it was time to eat, everyone in the host’s home just dug right in, without pausing to give thanks.
Bobby looked up and asked, “Don’t you pray before you eat?”
The amused host answered, “Well, no, we don’t”
To which the Bobby replied, “Oh, neither does my dog.” Then he folded his hands and silently prayed.
Bobby opened a can of pears.
His mother asked; "What did you use to open that can, Bobby?"
"Can-opener, of course," Bobby grunted. "What d'ye think I opened it with?"
"From the language I heard, I thought perhaps you were opening it with prayer."
Bobby said; “Well, Mom, you said no and Dad said no. Now I’m going to go ask God.”
Bobby went to his Sunday school teacher with a piece of paper and this request: “Our class would like you to answer these 52 questions about prayer. We left room on the paper for the answers and a Bible verse and could you bring 12 copies with you next Sunday.”
Bobby lived next door to an atheist. Every day, Bobby prayed, the atheist guy could hear him. The neighbor thought to himself, “Bobby sure is crazy, praying all the time like that. Doesn’t he know there isn’t a God?”
One day, Bobby’s family ran out of groceries. As usual, he was praying to the Lord explaining his situation and thanking Him for what He was gonna do.
AS USUAL, the atheist heard Bobby praying and thought to himself. “Hmph . . .I’ll fix him.”
He went to the grocery store, bought a whole bunch of groceries, took them to Bobby’s house, dropped them off on the front porch, rang the door bell and then hid in the bushes to see what he would do. When he opened the door and saw the groceries, he began to praise the Lord with all his heart, jumping, singing and shoutin’ everywhere!
The atheist then jumped out of the bushes and told his, “You crazy kid, God didn’t buy you those groceries, I bought those groceries!”
Well, he broke out and started running down the street, shouting and praising the Lord. When the neighbor finally caught Bobby, he asked what his problem was . . .
Bobby said, “I knew the Lord would provide my family with some groceries, but I didn’t know he was gonna make the devil pay for them!”
Bobby prayed, “And forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets.”
Bobby asked three preachers who were sitting together the best positions for prayer while a telephone repairman worked nearby.
"Kneeling is definitely best," claimed one.
"No," another contended. "I get the best results standing with my hands outstretched to Heaven."
"You're both wrong," the third insisted. "The most effective prayer position is lying prostrate, face down on the floor."
The repairman could contain himself no longer. "Hey, fellas, " he interrupted, "the best prayin' I ever did was hangin' upside down from a telephone pole."
Bobby told his daddy he'd like to have a baby brother and, along with his request, offered to do whatever he could to help. His dad, a very bright 35 year old, paused for a moment and then replied, "I'll tell you what, Johnny, if you pray every day for two months for a baby brother, I guarantee that God will give you one!"
Bobby responded eagerly to his dad's challenge and went to his bedroom early that night to start praying for a baby brother.
He prayed every night for a whole month, but after that time, he began to get skeptical. He checked around the neighborhood and found out that what he thought was going to happen, had never occurred in the history of the neighborhood. You just don't pray for two months and then, whammo- a new baby brother. So, Bobby quit praying. After another month, Bobby's mother went to the hospital. When she came back home, Bobby's parents called him into the bedroom. He cautiously walked into the room, not expecting to find anything, and there was a little bundle lying right next to his mother. His dad pulled back the blanket and there was -- not one baby brother, but two!! His mother had twins!
Bobby's dad looked down at him and said, "Now aren't you glad you prayed?"
Bobby hesitated a little and then looked up at his dad and said, "Yes, but aren't you glad I quit when I did?"
This is Bobby, dear Lord,
So far today, God, I've done all right. I haven't lost my temper, haven't been greedy, grumpy, nasty, or selfish. I'm really glad about that.
But in a few minutes, God, I'm going to get out of bed and go to school. From this time on I'm probably going to need a lot more help.
In Jesus name in Jesus name I pray.