Bobby’s mother invited some people to dinner.
At the table, she turned to Bobby and said,
"Would you like to say the blessing?"
"I wouldn't know what to say," he replied.
"Just say what you hear Mommy say," the mother answered.
Bobby bowed his head and said,
"Lord, why on earth did I invite all these people to dinner?"
Bobby was overheard praying:
"Lord, if you can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it. I'm having a real good time like I am."
Bobby’s grandfather was walking past his grandson’s room one night when he saw him kneeling beside his bed, with head bowed and hands folded, repeating the alphabet.
"What are you doing?" he asked him.
He explained, "I'm saying my prayers, but I couldn't think of just what I wanted to say. So I'm just saying all the letters of the alphabet, and God can put them together however he thinks best."
Bobby walked down the beach, and as he did, he spied a woman sitting under a beach umbrella on the sand. He walked up to her and asked, "Are you a Christian?"
"Do you read your Bible every day?"
She nodded her head, "Yes."
Do you pray often?" Bobby asked next, and again she answered, "Yes."
With that he asked his final question, "Will you hold my money while
I go swimming?"
Bobby asked his grandfather how he liked wireless communication.
His grandfather responded; “Wireless communication is nothing new. I have been praying for 70 years.”
Bobby was proud of the fact he could say the Lord’s Prayer from memory.
Finally, he decided to go solo for his mother and father. He carefully enunciated each word perfectly, right up to near the end of the prayer:
"Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from E-mail."
Thank you for our Sunday school teacher but she wants to polish off the book of Leviticus in the next 18 weeks. How do we tell her we don’t want to do this?
TEACHER: Now, Bobby, tell me honestly, do you say prayers before eating?
Bobby: No sir, I don't have to, my Mom is a good cook.
I have heard that the government has spent millions of dollars to study old people. Is it true that they found out those who live the longest have the most birthdays? If so, please give me many birthdays.